Lives do not matter . . .

Sunset Park at Lake Maurepas (wish the sun had been setting!)

I've been staying away from this journal of mine because I'm so upset by the murders of the policemen in Baton Rouge. I have to keep my thoughts on them because there is so much hatred and pure evil in the world that I have trouble keeping my mind clear. I don't think I can process the information I receive in the paper, on TV or via the Internet without bursting into tears. I don't know a single person that is involved in anyway but I feel sick to my stomach and cry easily because I can't begin to understand how we've gotten to this point. I remember the civil rights marches of the 1960's and the horrors of the KKK.  I remember Vietnam and perhaps that is the closest I can get to the sick feeling in my gut, heart, body and brain. P&D's Pop was in Vietnam throughout 1966 and I think I may have buried the fear his Mom and I lived with each and every day. I know we were not alone but somehow you feel forsaken when you are helpless and someone you love is in constant danger. P&D's Pop never speaks of Vietnam and if the topic comes up he speaks of it as if  in a distant past that is better left there. Well with what's happening in this beloved country I have come to the sad conclusion that Lives Still Do Not Matter. We kill the unborn and euthanize the old, send our young men and women to fight evil without proper mindset, training and weapons Perhaps this has been going on forever and I'm such a dope because I believed that people can put up with one another even though we are different in all ways except for being human. But the peoples of this planet Earth seem determined to annihilate each other and it begins right here at home. I don't feel as if I've lived a very long time and yet I've seen this rotted human behavior so many times before.

As usual lately I can't make heads or tails out of the life outside of our own little home and yard. The only way I can survive the churning discontent I feel is seeking out the ones I cherish more than my own life and try to help others no matter where I encounter 'these others' and I must also take the time to enjoy the beauty in nature even though there are times I fear its wrath. I suppose it's possible that it is impossible for mankind to live in peace. Perhaps there is a missing link and man is left to search for it with no help from our Creator. I keep coming back to the thought that there are two gods, one good one evil and in their war of religions evil now has the upper hand. What to do? That is the question. I wish I could feel some kind of confidence in my own soul that as long as I do the best I can in my life I'm contributing to someone else's happiness and therefore to my own contentment and the happiness of those with whom I come in contact each day. It certainly isn't easy to come up with solutions to rid the world of the hate found in human souls. And that isn't even going into the politics of this mad country and world!

I may have to change what I call this blog, perhaps: Whatever passes through my skull. It certainly doesn't have to make sense.  So I guess that's not a bad title! (Ce qui se passe dans ma tete? Peut etre?) But that is sort of scary!

Quote:  Cowards falter, but danger is often overcome by those who nobly dare.   _____Queen Elizabeth